Going back to school after the summer vacation can be tough on certain kids. The transition from vacation to school is not always smooth sailing during the first or even second week of the new school term. Not all kids are super excited to start school. One of those kids is my youngest daughter, Mika. School is not her favourite place to look forward to after a fun-filled holiday break. In fact, she wish to be home-schooled as she stressed this to us repeatedly. Unlike Lea (my other daughter) who is always eager for the new school year to start; Mika is not so enthusiastic.
For the past three years, since starting Grade 1, Mika has been experiencing back-to-school anxiety. She would get physically ill. Her blood pressure would drop resulting in dizziness, vomiting and complaints of headaches and stomach cramps. But we always insisted on school attendance and only in severe cases would keep her home. Usually by the second week of the new school year, she has settled in and all is forgotten. (more…)
From the age of six both my daughters have been receiving invitations for sleepover parties. With the kids being older, sleepover requests are still streaming in. Our stance on this is – we simply do not allow sleepovers at friends.
Before I continue, sleepover exceptions include staying over at their grandparents and cousins, go on school camps and for the first time this year my eldest daughter went to a one-night group sleepover at school. As for the group sleepover at school; our kids attend an all girls school and the sleepover is a social event organised for a specific grade. Well supervised by female teachers, they have a programme of activities lined up for the girls and they all sleep in the school hall that is secured.
My daughter, Lea is in such a happy mood this morning. Hopping, skipping and singing at the top of her voice. It’s her birthday and she has been waiting for this day to arrive with eager anticipation. I watch her and smile. There is so much love that is booming at the moment. A love that is eternal and unmeasurable.
As I watch her, an exhilarating feeling comes over me. This child made me a mother. Knowing that my husband and I made this human, and that she is half mine and his DNA. Like my kids will always say “we are the best thing that ever happened to the two of you.”
And they are spot on, they are the best thing that ever happened to us. Knowing what we know now, life without them would be pretty dull.
Let’s face it we all tell little white lies now and then. Whether it is to protect our children or not to harm someone else’s feelings – we do it.
But what happens if the lies are constant … more like compulsive lying.
Even worse what if it’s a child that is constantly lying about everything and anything. You would assume that children are naturally truthful. Well so you would think, turns out it is not the case.
Today my daughter came home from school pretty devastated. She and her friends are at wits end with one particular friend’s lies.
So when your child comes home and vents her anger and frustration about the current situation – you listen.
Avoid raising a self-centred child and stop indulging a sense of entitlement at home
Raising a child in the 21st century is not easy. Especially with the constant demands that society place on us. Falling into the entitlement trap can happen so easily. Perhaps you have been oblivious to the fact that you are already in that trap and didn’t see it coming.
As you read the following points listed, think about whether one or even more of these are familiar to you.
There is no greater love than that of a mother to her child or children. Now this might sound cheesy and like an old cliché but you do know that the best Mother’s Day gift I received was the day the two of you were born.
With Mother’s Day a couple of days away, I’m sure that you are stressing about what to get me. Or should I say you are hounding your father to come up with a plan and be your financial resource. The latter I don’t mind but this needs to come from the two of you. As I did not birth your father and I am by no means his mother. By the way, he is just as clueless when it comes to knowing exactly what I want.
It’s about 14h00 on Saturday afternoon as my husband and I walk into the supermarket to get some much needed items. We see a mom with 3 kids as we enter the store. Looking at their size, I’m of the opinion that the kids could be all under the age of 5. With the youngest sitting in the trolley. The mom squats down to the level of the two older ones, indicating to them to behave. Her tone is calm and she looks relaxed.
Whilst in the shop, I spot the mom and her three kids again, this time in the toiletries aisle. The youngest is having a meltdown and the other two is acting out. Kicking each other, shouting and running about. Once again she gathers them and instructs them to behave.
This time she looks a bit flustered but still seems calm. Flustered because of the embarrassment she felt at that particular moment as people started staring and scrutinizing her ability to handle the situation.
Unless you had a colicky baby, it is something that those parents who have not experienced it won’t understand. An experience that I wish on no parent, especially a first time mom.
Experiencing motherhood for the second time, had to be a breeze. Or so I thought. She was a full term baby, healthy and breastfed. This was completely opposite to our first birthing experience.
Remembering our first experience with colic 8 years ago. When our second daughter, Mika, developed it at 4 weeks old. Crying non-stop from 18h00 – 22h00 at night. Colic was something unforeseen as we didn’t go through it with our first daughter. Creeping up on us out of the blue. It was a predictable scene that played off in front of us every single night.
It’s mid-January and you are yet to recover financially from the festive season. Plus with children returning to school last week, the costs of stationery, school uniform and school fees are adding up. If your child has just started Grade R or Grade 1; you probably did not expect the escalating cost of sending your child to school.
Apart from the school fees, the most expensive item is probably the school uniform. The annual rising costs of school uniforms in South Africa are putting additional financial pressure on parents to fork out more money to fit out their children.
It will probably set you back over R3500 if not more to fit your child out in the full school uniform, including school shoes and sportswear.
Dealing with early childhood separation anxiety
Separation anxiety is often played down as a tantrum. Believe me when I say this – it is not. Separation anxiety is real for children. Throwing a tantrum is just a coping mechanism for kids to deal with this anxiety.