It has been eleven weeks since my father passed away. The phone calls and messages have stopped. No more flowers, cards and visits. In fact, life has returned to normal as if nothing happened. However, my father’s death did happen which caused a ripple effect of grief.
Life as I’ve known it before 6 April 2019 will never be the same again. Removing one person from a family unit which has always been a supportive structure; changes the entire dynamics. Although our family structure is not falling apart; the foundation has slight cracks. Perhaps those who don’t have that kind of unit won’t understand. (more…)
A peaceful death, an unexpected death, a tragic death – no matter how it occurs – dealing with the death of a loved one or friend remains extremely difficult. Guaranteed and unavoidable; yet it’s a subject that will also be unpleasant. It’s unpleasant because we fear the unknown. And when we fear something it makes us uncomfortable and anxious.
This past week has been rough. With the death of six people I know within days from each other. Death made its appearance like a thief in the night in the middle of June.
All six (family, friends and acquaintances) who passed were frail, weak and had sick beds. They too feared death at some point in their lives but I believe in my heart that they were at peace with the fact that their final hour was close by. Some were able to converse and say what should happen when they die. And yes we as the surviving family and friends knew it was just a matter of time; we knew that death would release them from their suffering. During this time the family made to-do lists, updated necessary documentation and started making the necessary preparations should anything happen. They waited in anticipation. But ironically; the day when death came knocking we all remained physically and mentally unprepared.
This beckons the question. How do we as the surviving family and friends deal with death and grief.