grief and loss Archives - Miller In The City

Noleen Miller August 20, 2020

To a remarkable mother-in-law

Today has been a day of feelings. I felt broken-hearted, fragile, low, angry, overwhelmed and exhausted. I thought I had this grieving thing under control. After all I’ve been through this before. No matter how many times you experience grief; it’s doesn’t get any easier. It’s flippen hard and damn complicated.It’s been 2 weeks since your passing and today has really hit hard. I had my moment, I was alone at home, the weather was pretty miserable. As the rain drops rolled down the window; so were the tears streaming down my cheeks. I had an uncontrollable reaction to what I have lost – a remarkable mother-in-law, a woman of strength and courage. I broke down and cold no longer suppress my feelings – I had to let go. View Post

Noleen Miller June 26, 2018

DEATH, The unpleasant subject and dealing with grief

Death unpleasant subject dealing grief

A peaceful death, an unexpected death, a tragic death – no matter how it occurs – dealing with the death of a loved one or friend remains extremely difficult. Guaranteed and unavoidable; yet it’s a subject that will also be unpleasant. It’s unpleasant because we fear the unknown. And when we fear something it makes us uncomfortable and anxious.

This past week has been rough. With the death of six people I know within days from each other. Death made its appearance like a thief in the night in the middle of June.

All six (family, friends and acquaintances) who passed were frail, weak and had sick beds. They too feared death at some point in their lives but I believe in my heart that they were at peace with the fact that their final hour was close by. Some were able to converse and say what should happen when they die. And yes we as the surviving family and friends knew it was just a matter of time; we knew that death would release them from their suffering. During this time the family made to-do lists, updated necessary documentation and started making the necessary preparations should anything happen. They waited in anticipation. But ironically; the day when death came knocking we all remained physically and mentally unprepared.

This beckons the question. How do we as the surviving family and friends deal with death and grief.

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