Negativity, selfishness, arrogance, refusal and rejection is associated with the word “no”. Therefore it is always so easy to say “yes” as we don’t want to hurt people’s feelings. However saying no can be liberating especially if the opportunity that arises brings no value to your life. I have taken up the NO-vember challenge to actively test and embrace the power of saying “NO” to certain things.
10 Days in and it is going well so far. I am taking self-control by setting boundaries and saying “no” to things that is not good for my emotional well-being. This is not about being selfish but about taking care of myself for a change.
Below is a list of things that I have added to my No-vember challenge and how I will embrace the power of saying no.
No to over-commitment
2019 has taken a toll on me. It has been tough, physically and emotionally. I have come to the realization that I need to slow down as I have been stretched to the limit. Saying no to collaborations and events can be difficult as I don’t want to disappoint people. At the end I can only do so much and I am prioritizing what is important to find balance.
No to takers
I have always been a giver without expecting anything in return. I will go the extra mile to give advice, support and help those who are in need. It is not an obligation but an act of kindness. There are people who are genuinely grateful but then there are those who just take, expect and exploit. These takers have become demanding and have taken advantage of my kindness. I had enough and will be putting my foot down.
No to complaints
My office has always been a place where colleagues come to when they want to rant and rave. The intern calls me the “office shrink” as I would listen and sometimes give advice. But I am having none of it during this month. The reality is a complaining session does not fix the problem. Absorbing other people’s negative energy has a tendency to consume me and lose track of my own work. As for myself; let’s just hope that I experience little to no bad customer service during this time. It will be difficult to turn a blind eye but I will try my best not to complain.
No to things that bring no value
There are times when I give of my time to people and things that does not benefit me at all. During this month I will only say “yes” to opportunities and experiences that will enhance my life. I will surround myself with people who will inspire and nourish me to continue to grow at work and in my personal life.
No to bad news
All I ever hear and see is bad news, whether it is listening to the radio, watching television, on posters or social media. The negativity is a spirit damper and not good for my emotional well-being. I have decided not to listen or watch any news. Ignoring those dreadful poster headlines will be a bit of a challenge as it is in your face. The same goes for negativity on social media. I did a little bit of a clean up of social media. I have blocked certain groups from my Facebook page and unfollowed a few accounts on Instagram and Twitter too.
No to social media pressure
As a blogger my presence on social media is important to market and grow my brand. Yes there is social pressure because my audience is expecting me to deliver good content. Working with brands can also add to the pressure as there is a certain brief that I have to adhere to. Look no doubt people make serious money from posting on social media. For macro and mega influencers it is a business. And therefore posting perfectly curated content is a big deal. But let’s face it nobody’s life can be so perfect. But the pressure to conform and compare by scrolling through social media posts is real. And some people end up getting FOMO (fear of missing out).
Although Miller In The City is my unique brand, the blog itself is not my full time job. It has been a long time now that I am not putting out daily posts on social media as it is way too taxing. I am also more active on certain social media platforms than on others. To me it is not about gaining a huge amount of followers and likes. It is about making real connections with people who see and value my brand for what it is.
No to clutter
I have a tendency to take on other people’s unwanted clutter. It is usually stuff that I think I might use one day but actually never do. It will end up in a pile in the garage or study/tv room. Well November is the month to get organised and clear the clutter.
No to overspending
November is the month when I tend to overspend on things that I generally don’t need. Yip Black Friday is looming and every year I purchase things on impulse. I have already been receiving emails from online stores reminding me of Black Friday deals. I have set myself a strict budget and I am hoping to stick to it.
Find your voice and take up the No-vember challenge and embrace the power of saying no.