• Confession of a Backseat Driver: Time to take control and curb this bad habit

    confession backseat driver time take control curb bad habit

    I have a confession to make and it wasn’t easy for me to admit this. I am a backseat driver.

    Are you shocked by my revelation?  Sorry if I disappointed you but it is what it is.

    Yip, I’m that annoying passenger.

    And, let me just say, I guess I’ve earned this stereotypical name “backseat driver”.  Although I find myself mostly in the front passengers seat and not at the back; my reaction and behaviour is the same.

    The victim in the driver’s seat is my husband. Funny enough, this bad habit does not transpire when I’m a passenger in someone else’s car. Now I love my husband very much but the thing is when he drives, some demon just creeps out of me and I become this control freak.

    On the other hand, when I drive he doesn’t say a word. Do not comment on my driving skills or fault me in any way. I see myself as a pretty good driver, perhaps he sees that too.

    Also, I have to give credit to him for being very calm when I give comments and advice on his driving. Deep down I know he gets irritated but to avoid an argument, he keeps quiet.

    So here are typical things I say.

    Complaints about speed

    “Slow down”

    “We’ll never get there at this pace”

    “Keep your distance from the other car”


    “Go down here”

    “Try this route”

    “Why are we taking a detour?”



    “Watch that car”

    “Just give way to that that taxi or bus”

    “There’s a pothole”

    “You need to think for other driver’s as well”

    Driving skills

    “Seriously, where did you learn to drive?”

    “Stop changing lanes”

    Ludicrous is the perfect word to summarise the above. In actual fact, typing these comments made me realise how bad my behaviour is as a passenger.

    But today I’m here to end this – I’m ready to take control and curb this bad habit for good. I’m going to back off.

    My ramblings could cause a serious accident and I don’t want that to be on me.

    I have to take serious action as these tendencies have now starting rubbing off on my kids and they too have now become backseat drivers. Chirping from the back seat has now come in the form of “Let’s pass that slow coach”; “What’s the rush?”; “Do you even know where you going to?”; “Please, turn the volume up or down”

    Ways of curbing this bad backseat driver habit of mine

    1. Shift my attention. I will try and keep myself occupied with something and not focus my attention on his driving abilities.
    2. Critic jar. Adding R5 coins to a jar every time I criticise, advise or comment on his driving skills.
    3. Control and trust. I must allow him to take full control of the steering wheel and trust his abilities.
    4. Converse more.  Allow for more meaningful conversation instead of commenting on his driving skills.

    Now according to an article from Women on Wheels, passengers have the right to speak out on the following bad driving behaviour and even take control of the vehicle, if it makes them feel uncomfortable.

    • Drinking alcohol/taking drugs and driving
    • Talking on a cellphone without a handsfree kit
    • Texting and driving
    • Reckless driving by constantly switching lanes
    • Excessive speeding
    • Aggression towards other drivers, which can cause road rage

    Are you a backseat driver who give comments or does annoying things in a car? or Are you in the driver’s seat and have an annoying backseat driver hovering over you? Feel free to leave your comments.




    1. April 17, 2018 / 9:31 am

      Yes I sometimes make those comments to when I’m in the passenger seat and husband in the driver seat. **Sigh

      • Noleen Miller
        April 17, 2018 / 9:42 am

        We so bad – poor hubbies. But I’m stopping this nonsense and will allow him to take full control besides there’s too much at stake and I can end up being broke from putting money in that jar.

    2. April 17, 2018 / 10:29 am

      I think my husband and I are as bad as each other, especially when he’s driving my car! #itsok

      • Noleen Miller
        April 17, 2018 / 2:29 pm

        That can be a bit nerve wracking when he drives your car and you not to pleased with his diving skills. I suggest just breath and stay calm #itsok

    3. April 17, 2018 / 1:19 pm

      I’m quite bad at this too! But gestures not words….like grabbing the armrest in the car or making a “Tskkk” noise! Haha! #dreamteam

      • Noleen Miller
        April 17, 2018 / 2:31 pm

        My husband wouldn’t notice the gestures so being verbal is more my thing but I’m controlling myself now. Going to be difficult but it’s something I need to deal with and control #dreamteam

    4. April 18, 2018 / 5:52 pm

      I am a terrible back seat driver. However in my defence, my husband does drive rather too fast. I need to just close my eyes and listen to music. 🙂

      • Noleen Miller
        April 19, 2018 / 8:38 am

        Well if you feel that he is speeding and it’s making you uncomfortable then you have a right to say something. Other than that yip I agree, we just need to close our eyes and keep ourselves occupied with other things.

    5. April 18, 2018 / 6:07 pm

      Me too… Also terrible back seat driver lol!

      • Noleen Miller
        April 19, 2018 / 8:38 am

        Oh my so I’m not the only one – lol

    6. April 18, 2018 / 7:33 pm

      I’m not but my husband is. To the point that I never drive him. Ever!

      • Noleen Miller
        April 19, 2018 / 8:42 am

        Oh wow, I must say my husband’s behaviour is pretty good when I drive – perhaps he is just better and keeping his opinions to himself than what I am.

    7. April 20, 2018 / 10:28 am

      At least you’re honest about it!!! #BlogCrush

    8. April 21, 2018 / 1:20 am

      You sound so like my other half !
      There is nothing worse than a bank seat driver!

    9. April 21, 2018 / 7:03 pm

      I try not to comment on anyones driving, unless they do something really silly/dangerous. #fortheloveofBLOG

      • Noleen Miller
        April 24, 2018 / 1:55 pm

        You so good – I’m trying my best and so far so good #fortheloveofblog

    10. April 22, 2018 / 12:06 am

      Hehe! I’m trying not to laugh.. but when I read ‘slow down’ that is exactly what comes out of my mouth too. It’s so hard not to comment when you spot something first, like potholes or traffic lights turning. But you are right that sometimes it’s best not to say anything. Thanks for joining us for the #DreamTeam x

      • Noleen Miller
        April 24, 2018 / 1:54 pm

        Just to let you know that my husband made a mistake when driving over the past weekend. I just laughed but didn’t comment. Then he said to me, it is so unusual not to have comments coming from me and perhaps that’s why he is driving so crap on that particular day #dreamteam

    11. April 22, 2018 / 2:10 pm

      I hate to admit I’m a passenger seat driver (alsobonly with my fiancé) and I don’t even have my own license! Slipping off now…. Thanks so much for linking up to the #itsok linky xx

      • Noleen Miller
        April 23, 2018 / 9:27 am

        Haha – Love it. You remind me of my sister – she also comments and push breaks but don’t have her own license #itsok

    12. April 25, 2018 / 3:37 pm

      Ah, backseat driving. My husband does it ALL THE TIME (irritatingly only when I am driving) and it drives me up the wall!!! That said, I make my share of comments when he’s at the wheel too…#Blogcrush#itsok

      • Noleen Miller
        April 26, 2018 / 10:13 am

        The thing is I’m lucky that he doesn’t comment when I’m driving that’s why I am trying to control myself when he drives and not to dish out comments. I suppose if he had to comment on my driving – it’s would’ve driven me nuts as well. Like they say if you dish it out, you have to be able to take it as well #Blogcrush #itsok

    13. April 25, 2018 / 5:02 pm

      I’m exactly the same which is why I always choose to drive. I just can’t relax otherwise. Thank you for sharing with #StayClassymama

      • Noleen Miller
        April 26, 2018 / 10:18 am

        We so bad #Stayclassymama

      • Noleen Miller
        May 2, 2018 / 11:52 am

        I can tell you one thing for sure – trying to control myself has not been easy. I think it now but can’t say it aloud – that is the worst #blogcrush

    Leave a Reply